The Rapping Cyclops of Weehawken
Plus book clubs, a delicious French perk for Gazette readers, Paterson upgrades and more!
Welcome back to another thrilling installment of the Weehawken Gazette! Let this soothing image of Paterson’s Great Falls wash over you—and speaking of water, breaking news: Weehawken summer pool signups opened today. Register here. OK now let’s begin for reals…
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For Whom The Wedding Bells Toll: A Lincoln Tunnel Love Story
“Ryan William Smith and Andrea Marie Gallo met in early October 2022 at Weehawken Stadium in New Jersey.”
We love love stories, and the above is the first line of a recent New York Times article about a North Jersey romance. Smith and Gallo live in Hoboken, got married in Jersey City, and yes, they met in Weehawken, the romance capital of the Northeast.*
And what the NY Times doesn’t mention is that they met in the Hawk thanks to Hive Athletic, who run adult recreational sports leagues in Hudson County. Hive’s Instagram even shared a post celebrating the newly-wed couple.
Read the whole story here on the NY Times: They Took A Swing At Dating Again
Hudson Restaurant Week Is Dead: But Faubourg Is Offering A Steal Of A Deal
Remember Hudson Restaurant Week? It’d been going for two decades but this year it’s gone, and no one knows why. The website is down, the last mention of it was February 2025, and I called the Hudson County Tourism office and they had no answer and never got back to me.
In any case, to fill the reasonable offerings void, Faubourg Weehawken is stepping in with a delicious deal.
✨ $45pp+ three-course prix fixe
🍽 Offered daily starting at 5pm
📅 Menu here for March 2-15
Aside from this, Faubourg has an “Imperial Hour,” which is their happy hour that’s 4-7p at the main bar daily, and in the lounge Fri & Sat. Menu for that is here.
Why we care…
Lately more and more chains have sprouted along the Gold Coast. We try hard not to be neg, but it’s starting to look like an airport food court around here. Do we really want to live in a world of frozen foods and ghost kitchen meals?
Recently, I spoke to spoke to Daniel Boulud alums Dominique Paulin and Chef Olivier Muller, pictured below, the owners of Faubourg, along with their Director of Operations, Liza Stankowski.
We had a chat, and below are some of the highlights of what we learned. Note: this is not an ad, no payola here, just some details. But there is a benefit for Gazette readers at the end.
Sourcing matters: Faubourg uses high-quality beef from DeBraaga, a local butcher in Jersey City, and seafood from Peter’s Fish in Bergen County, a two-generation family-owned supplier. Plus desserts are all from scratch, and if you didn’t know, Paulin and Muller also own Bijoux French Pastry in Montclair.
The sommelier: Philip Marchal is a longtime friend of the owners. He has written the wine list, sold wine to restaurants, and has also made his own wine and created his own brand.
The private dining room: has a separate entrance, and a swanky cocktail lounge that leads to it.
Lounge that leads to the private dining room, photo by Kirra Cheers Seasonal ingredients: They stock their menu with what’s fresh in the moment. Like there’s winter chicory now, and ramps coming soon. They are committed to using foods “when they are their best” and say they try to surprise the guests with things they might not have had before.
Artistry: The Montclair and Weehawken locations have a lot in common, but they have different CDC’s — no, that’s not shorthand for the Center for Disease Control — it’s restaurant lingo for Chef de Cuisines. This means even though some dishes are similar, each chef has autonomy to be creative and serve the interests of their own unique clientele.
Special benefit for Weehawken Gazette readers? Mais bien sûr!
If you go to Faubourg for dinner they are offering a free basket of warm, freshly-baked citrusy madeleines to any patron who mentions reading about the restaurant in the Weehawken Gazette. Ooh la ya!
The Rapping Cyclops of Weehawken: The Interview
Many round these parts know the Weehawken Rap, performed by Daveed Diggs of Hamilton the Musical fame on the hit Apple TV show Central Park. But there was another famous Weehawken rapper before that, and he’s a cyclops. Yes, more than a decade ago the Rapping Cyclops of Weehawken video landed, but it’s new-to-us as a shortened version hit Instagram recently and it is getting shared like wildfire.
On YouTube, one commenter wrote, “This masterpiece has existed for 13 years and I’m only now discovering it thanks to Instagram.” To which another commenter replied, “Bro same.”
We wanted to know more so we reached out to actor/comedian Brian Scolaro, pictured above on the right. Originally from Brooklyn, Brian lived in Hollywood for 21 years before moving back to Queens in the pandemic. He’s appeared on many big shows including Mad Men, Dexter and he was a regular cast member, on FOX’s Stacked with Pam Anderson. He has three comedy specials, and he’s done stand-up on lots of late-night TV shows. Here’s a few questions we had for him about the video.
Why choose Weehawken? Just because it’s a funny name? Have you ever been in Weehawken?
Well, I used to work along the Hudson River when I was in college and High School with The Marist Brothers who had a summer camp there for mentally challenged adults. I wasn’t a camper. I was a counselor. So let’s make that clear. But I fell in love with that whole area. But yeah, mainly I chose the name because it’s funny. Plus, my ex-girlfriend said I had a weehawken too. I don’t talk to her anymore.
When was the video filmed? Who wrote it and who are the people in it?
Four of my friends from college and I formed a video sketch comedy group back in the late nineties back before everyone had a camera in their coat pocket. We would pass out VHS tapes of our skits. We have over 130 of them. We were among the first ever to be featured on YouTube back in 2005. We were called Voodoowop Pictures. I am the only one who went into this professionally. The others had brains and lives.
Anyway, in 2014 area we decided to do a webseries called “Legend Hunters” where three guys searched for monsters, myths, and legends. And then caught them. And then ate them. We found a riddling troll, an extremely kind alien, a shapeshifter, a jive turkey, a racist lobster, and a sasquich — which is half Saquatch/half sandwich. In this episode, we found a rapping cyclops.
Do you worry this video might offend the actual Weehawken cyclops?
We ate him. He’s dead. But that probably did offend him. Yeah.
Thanks to Brian for his time! Follow him here on Instagram: instagram.com/brian_scolaro
🐉 WHS Theatre Is On Fire!
Speaking of fantastical creatures, Weehawken High School theater presents their musical soon, and we can assure you that this will be the hottest ticket in town. Their Instagram has blown up with millions (literally!) of views on their recent videos and we know it’s going to be a good time. The Sunday Matinee will also have the option to add a “Shrek Tea Party” with treats, crafts, and photo ops for an extra $15, which gets in 1 child and 1 adult.
What: Shrek the Musical
When: 3/13/2026 – 3/15/2026
Where: Weehawken High School, 53 Liberty Pl, Weehawken
Tickets: Buy them online here: the option for the tea party is explained/offered with any Sunday purchase.
Paterson Gets Some Surprisingly Schmancy Upgrades 💅
Many years ago I fell asleep on a Manhattan-to-NJ gypsy bus and woke up thinking I’d missed just one stop past Weehawken—but no, I was in Paterson. My phone died soon after, and I walked the streets long after midnight wearing a fancy dress and a velvet cape because I’d been performing in a show. I walked by a crumbling stadium and tried to flag down cabs. No one robbed me, but no one stopped for me either, probably because I looked like a freelance vampire.
Gotta say Paterson did not impress. But thing is, that abandoned stadium? It’s quite historic, now renovated, and reopened in 2023 for games, concerts, and events. It’s called Hinchcliff Stadium and the legendary NY Cosmos soccer club will start playing there in March, as part of the USL. Yes, yet another NJ club with a NY name, but whachagonnado?
And less than a half mile from the stadium, Paterson’s mayor Andrew Sayegh did a ribbon cutting with a particularly giant pair of scissors for a new footbridge at their Great Falls. And just this past Friday, Paterson finished a 5-year $15 million renovation on Lambert Castle. If you haven’t been to Garret Mountain, it’s more than 300 acres and a great place to hike, run and enjoy skyline views and nature. The Gazette team figures our invitation to dine with the Paterson royal family is in the mail.
NorthJersey.com: See inside newly restored Lambert Castle during a reopening ceremony
TapInto.net: New Footbridge Reopens at Paterson Great Falls, Restoring Key Link for Visitors
In Brief
📚 March 23rd at 7p — Weehawken Library Adult Book club is discussing “The God Of The Woods” and on March 30th Sci-Fi and Fantasy Book club is talking about “Every Heart A Doorway.” Heard good things about both so, get reading! Stop by for a copy or reserve yours at bccls.org
🎥 🪦 Luxury IPIC movie theater in Fort Lee is set to close due to (another) bankruptcy. Story via NJ.com: N.J. dine-in movie theater to close, lay off 97 workers
🍴 🍸 Speaking of upscale dining options, West + Co. is a new waterfront brasserie coming to West New York in “late April 2026.” 250 seats, outdoor terrace, and a unique offering called “The Wax Room” which they describe as an “invitation-only, speakeasy-style space hidden behind the kitchen, complete with more than 1,000 vinyl records and a turntable-driven listening experience.”
Millions In Fed Funding for Northern NJ
Rep. Rob Menendez sent an email detailing funding secured for North Hudson. Interesting for us was the $2 million Union City is getting for an elevator which presumably will get you down the cliff? Or maybe just off the footbridge? Anyway, in case you’re interested, here’s slim details on who is getting what from a pot of $19 million and what it’s slated for. Sadly no funicular or wagon elevator for Weehawken… yet! Related: if you care about getting from here to there, HudCoStreets is having a first-ever Transit Forum April 25th.
Toodles & Tah 4 Now
Hugo Holland is our unpaid copyeditor this week. While editing, he was told, “Whatever, whatever just move along!” It’s a drag having someone with standards… Anyway, in case you missed it, he recently wrote about a Shakespeare performance at Stevens.
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Tah for now, nice nabes!
Susie
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*We made that love capital stuff up, but you can’t prove it’s not true, can ya?